“Do you have any marriage advice for us?” Anita & Ashwin asked, as we made our way into Center City for their wedding photos. Our newly married couple was Philadelphia’s newest husband-and-wife, freshly minted at the groom’s home church merely an hour ago. In all my years of documenting weddings, I get asked many questions – usually pertaining to timelines and shooting locations. However, this question was certainly a first, and I was just as indubitably honored as I was mildly apprehensive about doling out sage marriage advice (in all honesty, Karis and I are just figuring this stuff out as we go along). But nevertheless, this is what I told them:
“I want you guys to remember today, and all the love that you have for each other at this very moment. There will come day in your marriage when you’ll disagree, and you might even want to kill each other. But it’s at those times, I want you to remember this day; where all was right with the world, and there existed a time in your lives when you have all this incredible love for each other. Reminding yourself, that at the end of the day, you’ll always be coming from a place of love, that you guys are in this together – this is the most important thing you’ll need to remember if you want a successful marriage.”
“Yeup. And it’s okay to go to bed angry.” Karis chimes in from the back seat. “I go to bed angry all the time!”
We all laughed.
(Did I also mention that a sense of humor was also important?)